Does Perfection Really Exist?
How we fall prey to unattainable messages about perfection
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First things first let me make this clear incase you didn’t know already: THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS PERFECTION. Writing in capitals seems like I’m shouting I know, but I had to make a point. The perfect body, the perfect home, the perfect relationship, the perfect career, the perfect life… These things just don’t exist. They aren’t real. They’re figments of our imagination we’ve constructed into a dreamlike reality over the years. Striving to achieve perfection is something that's been ingrained in us from an early age, and it’s making us miserable. News flash; perfection is overrated.Â
The definition of perfection: the state or quality of being perfect.
What is perfection you may ask? Perfection, like so many things, is in the eye of the beholder. It’s subjective. What you may consider to be perfect I may see as imperfect, and vice versa. The concept of perfection is problematic and deeply embedded in society, many of us spending an excessive amount of time trying to obtain if not create perfection. How we judge perfection is based on our lived experiences, our expectations, and our beliefs. The rise in perfectionism doesn’t mean we're becoming more accomplished, it means we’re becoming more self-critical. From not being thin enough, to not being rich enough, the list of things we find wrong with ourselves is endless. When you strive for perfection, you neglect the here-and-now. You forget to appreciate what's right in front of you. We need to stop chasing perfection.
Is perfection myth or fact? And if it is a myth, why do we spend most of our lives searching for it? The moralistic value we assign to perfection is draining. A combination of tabloid newspapers, the media, social media, and reality TV has supercharged us into a state of constant critique. Glossy advertising campaigns, supermodels covering the pages of our favourite magazines, and celebrity glo-ups tell us that in order to have the perfect lifestyle this is what we need to be, this is what we need to look like. Wouldn’t the world as we know it be incredibly boring if we all looked the same? Talked the same? Wore the same clothes and drove the same cars? I think our definition of perfection needs some tweaking - if not erasing completely.
Perfection can’t be defined by a six figure salary or an hourglass body. Whether you’re trying to create a perfect meal, have the perfect relationship, or live in the perfect home, its worthwhile remembering perfection doesn’t really exist. The highs and lows of our complicated time on Earth come at us thick and fast, with many twists and turns along the way. We all have flaws, we all make mistakes, that just makes us human and is a part of life. When you look in the mirror if your reflection doesn’t scream perfection, that’s okay. It’s ‘perfectly’ normal in fact. You are not a failure, and you haven’t failed at life. I’ve struggled with perfectionism over the years, and I know I’m not alone. As of right now, am I perfect? Absolutely not. Will I ever be perfect, whatever that means? I doubt it. And I’m okay with that.Â
Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram and Twitter to see more of what I’m up to, and I’ll see you same time same place next week!Â
Catch you soon,
J’Nae
WHAT I’VE BEEN READING:
- I made a commitment at the start of this year to make a conscious effort to read more works/novels/essays/articles/literature by Black writers and Black authors, I just started reading The Water Dancer by Ta-Nehisi Coates and I’m blown away already. A beautiful tale of man's journey to freedom, coupled with some magic and mystery along the way, it's a definite page-turner.
WHAT I’VE BEEN WATCHING:
- I know I know I'm ridiculously late to the party, but I just finished watching You season 2 and damn! The plot twists in this show leave me gasping and I’m all for it, I can’t wait for season 3 in 2021.
WHAT I’VE BEEN LISTENING TO:
- I listen to Stormzy’s album ‘Heavy Is The Head’ on repeat, I know it’s not new but it’s still brilliant nonetheless. Also his Glastonbury 2019 headline performance was EPIC.
WHAT’S CAUGHT MY EYE:
- I follow @moon_patrol on Instagram and I love his artwork, in particular his collages and the way he combines images together for dramatic effect. He just released a beautiful limited edition copy of his book ‘The Art of Moon Patrol’, this is a great one for your coffee table.
ON MY BLOG:
- Lockdown restrictions may be easing slightly, but if you're in need of a banana bread recipe check my version out on my blog here.