Does Perfectionism Kill Creativity?
Tales from a burntout creative
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Speak to any artist, writer, designer, musician, and any other creative type, and I would bet money on the fact that each of them will tell you that at some point in their careers, and in their lives, they’ve struggled with perfectionism. Artists struggle to pick up the paintbrush and often stare at the same old blank canvas, world famous novelists get writer's block and can’t put pen to paper, designers lose all vision for their next fashion collection, and musicians struggle to write any new material, all whilst playing the dreaded perfection game. Creativity ebbs and flows, that’s entirely normal. But I’ve found that working across multiple creative industries has presented me with a persistent problem I have no idea how to navigate... How do I keep up my perfectionist tendencies as a creative, without it leading to burnout? And should I be aiming to achieve perfection at all?
We can all admit to playing some part in hustle and grind culture. As a millennial I know I’m guilty of falling into this trap, of constantly trying to be busy and look busy in the hope that I’ll earn the respect of my peers. Sometimes being a creative means you have to work this way merely as a means to survive. When your job is intertwined with your passions and hobbies, which is the case for a lot of creatives, it's hard to draw the line between your work and personal life, and know when to switch off. The typical work-life balance becomes redundant, you feel overwhelmed as you don’t know where one thing ends and the other begins. I try to suck it up and push through, battling whatever mental fatigue and exhaustion I’m experiencing. But I have to wonder, is there something wrong with me for not being able to push through the fog? Am I alone in thinking as rewarding as working in a creative industry can be, it’s also incredibly draining?
One of my biggest issues is aiming for perfection. In everything I do I want to make sure I do the best job possible which is great, but this one-track way of thinking comes with a downside. It stops me from taking risks, sways me to procrastinate, and kills my creative spark – at its very worst, it stops me from creating at all. Coping with the increasing demand put upon us to constantly be working and producing, and competing with my colleagues and peers in order to feel valued, really takes it out of me. Is it any wonder young adults like myself feel the need to be perfect in all areas of our lives, when we’re critiqued harshly for almost everything we do? I don’t mean this to sound like a pity party because it’s definitely not that. What I’m saying is we’ve been wired to think that we always have to be first-class in everything we do, and this is a dangerous game to be playing.
Trying to be the best and retain my thorny crown of perfection kills my inspiration. I get creative block, I procrastinate, and my entire world comes to a halt. The sinister thing about creative block is that it always seems to come after I’ve really been hitting it out the park, then all of a sudden all work seems to be difficult. My creative well runs dry, and I’m left feeling empty with a ton of deadlines I’m supposed to meet. But how am I supposed to work when I feel this way? Contrary to what you see on your Instagram feed, creatives are often fresh out of ideas. And it well and truly sucks.
Not only are judgemental outsiders fuelling my creative anxiety, I’m often my own worst enemy and I’m guilty of holding myself back. My inner critic reigns supreme, I have this nagging voice telling me what I put out into the world isn’t good enough, and I’ll never be able to ascend to the creative heights of those I admire. As creatives our fear of judgement and being overly concerned with what others think of us (and our work) is limiting, in an effort to try and do everything flawlessly we become our own biggest burdens. We fear that what we’ve painted, written, designed, and crafted doesn’t measure up. But what are we trying to measure up too? What invisible parameters of success are we trying to attain? When it’s hard to finish something we're actually quite proud of, it may be a sign that our creative sparks need rekindling.
Burnout, burnout, burnout. Good old burnout has a way of seeping into every facet of our lives without us realising, and once we do catch on to this invisible beast, by that point it’s already too late. Burnout symptoms can range from stress, to emotional exhaustion, a detachment and disregard for what’s going on in life, to chronic fatigue and a complete sense of failure. Whether you’re a creative or not, burnout can be crippling for any of us who get caught in its unrelenting wrath. When your career depends on you being imaginative five days of the week, burnout makes the simplest of tasks impossible. Creativity depends on a clear mindset where you can try new things and explore new ideas, all in the hope that you’ll have your next lightbulb moment. All of these qualities, and this free way of thinking, disappear as soon as you reach peak burnout. Brutal.
The precarious nature and uncertainty of creative work, along with the need to be perfect, creative block, fear of judgement, and burnout, all leave us creatives feeling exhausted and drained. No matter what industry you work in, these circumstances can unfortunately apply to us all. I know that never knowing when to switch off, coupled with an infectious need to be busy, kills my chances of expanding my creative career and evolving professionally. Perfectionism does kill creativity, which in turn leads to burnout. I for one can attest to that. So what do we do about it?
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Catch you soon,
J’Nae
WHAT I’VE BEEN READING:
- I Am Not Your Baby Mother by Candice Brathwaite, wow. This book left me speechless on multiple occasions… And very, very outraged. Part memoir part manifesto this is a deep look into how Black mothers, particularly Black British mothers, have the odds stacked against them from the get go, something that sadly doesn’t change as they navigate the tricky world of motherhood.
WHAT I’VE BEEN WATCHING:
- I love Sarah Paulson after watching her in Ratched, so anything new that she stars in I’ll 100% watch it. Run on Netflix is a horror/thriller about a mother who isolates her daughter from the outside world her whole life, and is also harbouring sinister secrets until her daughter discovers she’s been living a lie. A must watch.
WHAT I’VE BEEN LISTENING TO:
- 5 Minutes for Earth is a quick and easy to digest podcast series that explores a different environmental topic each week, and gives easy to action tips on how we can all do a little bit more to help the planet.
WHAT’S CAUGHT MY EYE:
- If you're suffering from a little wanderlust like me, or you just want inspiration for when we can finally travel wherever we like, @beautifuldestinations is a great account worthy of a follow.
ON MY BLOG:
- I love vintage. Vintage shopping lights a fire within me like no other, I’m always on the hunt for hidden vintage gems that I know no-one else will have. How To Shop For Vintage T-shirts (my number one favourite vintage item) gives a lot of great trips/tricks for when you go on your next vintage scavenger hunt.
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